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Conversations with Who?

I astonished myself yesterday by listening to an interview with Neale Donald Walsch, author of the Conversations With God books of a decade or so ago.

I never read the books because I'm not much for God, and have spent a good portion of my adult life on the agnostic-to-atheist spectrum, with a recent sojourn in the spare, dry country of Absolute Determinism sans even the smallest parasol of spirituality. But it's harsh and depressing there, and I've been flirting with the ineffable again lately because dammit, it just feels better.*

So anyway. In the interview, Walsch discusses "three secrets to ending the struggle and making your life work," and it was so refreshing that I was able to do some hand-waving around the God stuff and just absorb it. I took lots of notes.

The first secret is that your growth process is already complete. You're not here to grow or attain things or evolve, but to demonstrate the clarity and uniqueness you arrived with.

Bit of a shocker, this idea, because more-more-more is the American way of life, and you're never-ever-ever good enough, and your efforts never really suffice, and there's always someone higher up the path to sight on, envy, resent, admire or try to copy. I've been laboring under that delusion as long as I can remember.

Be The Source.

If you feel like you need more of something, says Mr Walsch, look around you for someone who needs even more of it than you do, and then give them some of it. Be the source of the thing you want more of.

If you have thirty cents and wish you had more money, give a dime to each of three people who would be glad just to have a dime. If you feel like you need more friends, go be a friend to someone even lonelier. If you feel unheard, go and really listen to someone.

Though our culture encourages us to deny our mastery, Walsh says, "Gently force yourself to remember a time when you said or did something that only a Master would say or do. That was when you knew who you really were" That's mastery. You think it's unusual--that it's not part of your real nature and that you just somehow "rose to the occasion." But it's evidence of mastery.

(I can remember a handful of such instances in my own history, and am now busy re-framing them.)

When you realize this, he says, you will see the whole of your life shift virtually overnight.

I propose to test the efficacy of this theory over the next few days and report back. I got off to a good start, feeling peaceful and joyous and full of grace, but then the whole wide world started annoying the crap out of me--a phenomenon I've often noticed when my inner defenses are feeling wobbly, so it's probably a good sign, since the inner defenses need to come down.

I'm beginning to see that I need far more stripping-away than I need adding-onto. The accretion of decades' worth of false beliefs, negative images, and general crust will require some serious spiritual exfoliation before the real me shows through. Hopefully there will be no need for a volcano.

*"Why are you so happy all the time?" someone reportedly asked the Dalai Lama, who reportedly answered, "Because it feels better."

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